My half way mark has come and gone, meaning I have less than 6 months to be able to have tacos and chavelas (Mexican drink). So lets see. This last week I felt like a worn out bag that you keep reusing till it’s lasts. I know that’s a pretty odd reference but I was done. I have been enjoying my time and blah blah blah but honestly it was just internal suckiness. Missing home, foods, people especially.
I was getting irritated with Thailand. Things I understood were becoming eye rolling causes. I’ve felt this way before. I’ve felt this way in America, like post midterms and finals are in two week feelings. March has tested me. It’s not Bangkok I’ve finally found the places I love and don’t want to miss yet! It’s not Thailand, like I said I’ve felt this way in America but just the time of year.
Looking back, March has really never been a good month for me. Last year I was on high stress working too many hours. Two years ago I had a life threatening car accident. And now, it’s March, in Thailand and I feel just the same. TESTED. Curious how it’s the middle of my grant year, like a MIDTERM!!
I’ve always thought that the best education is life skills and how to apply those boring books in everyday life. Meaning I think life and traveling is the best way to gain knowledge. How do we know we’re passing in Life 101? Well did I pass the test?
I think so. No matter how; excuse me but, shitty I felt, crying in public, calling my boyfriend and mom telling them how I’m probably going home…I’m here. I didn’t even stop going out. I continued pushing through this midterm and now that March is coming to a swift end, I feel another 2nd wind coming. Yes there will be more tests but for now I’m happy to say I’m passing and NOT giving up.
Do I miss friends? Yes I even missed my best friend’s engagement.
Do I miss my culture? Ever more so I spoke Spanish yesterday to a family of lost Latinos and it was a moment I will carry close to me because we were both grateful to have each other without knowing one another. The power of Language.
Do I miss my family? Ok i know i know obvious questions but yes.
Do I want to go back yet? No even with the back and forth and emotional roller coaster I’ve become, I even still think about staying an extra 3 months regardless if I know I for sure can’t.
Pictures from last week:
Presenting @ Kasetsart University with Fulbright
Thai Kanome from different Ps & coffee Everyday from P’Oy (I love that woman)
My open when letter from my two beautiful roommates (yes present tense lol) (March 25 = My mid-grant day)
Saraburi with P’ Noi (a Fulbright P who let me into her home and treated me sooo well. I simply love Thai hospitality and want to bring that back home with me too.
Rooftop bar with free drinks and a bomb burger
Easter with Ariel (Yes there are Catholic churches in Thailand)
I passed the Midterm, less than 6 months for the final,